WrestleMania 31 Predictions

We are roughly a week away from WrestleMania 31 as of this writing and I can honestly tell you that I am cautiously optimistic about how the card for this particular edition of "the showcase of the immortals" will turn out. This is in light of the fact that if you go back and look at an entry to this here blog that I published back in January (click here to read "My Still-Way-Too-Early-to-Tell WrestleMania 31 Predictions") wherein I attempted at that point in time to predict the card for WM31 you'll find that I turned out to be a half-assed prognosticator at best. I successfully predicted 5 of the 8 matches on the card, but they were the 5 obvious ones so I'm not even going to go so far as to claim a moral victory on that effort.

Looking at the official card for WM31, there were a few surprises that I did not see coming, namely the decision to feature the Intercontinental title in a ladder match that will likely be the "HOLY CRAP, DID YOU SEE THAT?!" portion of the show. I imagine it will be like the Money in the Bank match used to be before it was removed from WM cards in order to become the subject of its own pay-per-view in that it includes a whole bunch of athletic, super-talented competitors who don't mind getting into a train wreck every once in a while. I was glad to see that the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal is being brought back; it won't be a match with any consequence outside of the show, however it's an opportunity for someone to possibly break out as a talent to watch in the next few months. The Divas being in a tag team match as opposed to there being a match for the title makes me believe WWE didn't think a one-on-one match would've been anything other than a restroom break for a majority of the audience. Chances are it will still be a restroom break for most fans because the Divas division has been awfully stale for the past 4-5 months (which coincides with Nikki Bella's reign as champion, oddly enough). I am genuinely upset that the tag team division isn't on the card as it seemed as though there was momentum in building up that aspect of the roster that has now completely vanished. (Anyone seen the Ascension lately?) It's troubling because, for the life of me, I don't know why tag teams don't get a fair shake anymore.

Be that as it may, now that we know the full card for WM31 (other than whatever may take place during the pre-show, that is - assuming there is a pre-show, of course), lets revisit things and make a final set of predictions for WWE's biggest event of the year.

1) Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Participants: The Miz, Curtis Axel, Ryback, Fandango, Adam Rose, Zack Ryder, Jack Swagger, Titus O'Neil, Darren Young, Big Show, Kane, Erick Rowan, Damien Mizdow, Sin Cara, Goldust, Heath Slater and Mark Henry

I half way hate to say this seeing as how I want to think the Andre Memorial is supposed to mean something, but I look at that line-up and I can't think of anything especially noteworthy that's happened for more than half the names listed there in the past year. That's how Battle Royals tend to me, though; you've got a match where 95% of the talent involved have zero chance of winning plus 3-5 participants who should logically blow all the others out of the water.

What's interesting about this assemblage is that there's a chance several storylines could be conveniently tied up or extended during the course of the match. Curtis Axel and Ryback were tag team partners at one point (Ryback has also been tied to Erik Rowan ever since the 2014 Survivor Series); similarly, Titus O'Neil and Darren Young just recently reformed the Prime Time Players. Kane and Big Show have been in an uneasy alliance with the Authority lately, and Mark Henry has lately drawn the ire of both men. The Miz and Damien Mizdow haven't seen eye to eye ever since Mizdow became a bona fide fan favorite. Everyone else in the match - Fandango, Adam Rose, Zack Ryder, Jack Swagger, Sin Cara, Goldust, and Heath Slater - is there as filler in my opinion, but at least they'll get a nice payday.

I am going with this man as my predicted winner because I think the fans in attendance would all lose their minds if the match is executed properly and he were to win.

PREDICTION: Damien Mizdow

2) AJ Lee & Paige vs. The Bella Twins (Nikki & Brie)

There's been something of a women's rights movement within a segment of the WWE fanbase as of late stemming from comments made by several of the WWE Divas and how they should be respected, treated, etc. as their male counterparts on the roster are. The hashtag "Give Divas A Chance" became a thing just long enough for it to seem like WWE cared, but here we have this match that (in my eyes) tells me they had to put two of their best Divas (that being AJ Lee & Paige) in there with the Bellas just to counteract the level of suck that Nikki & Brie will introduce. I can't help but feel like this is an extension of something to do with the Total Divas show on the E! network, which is why I'm going to go ahead and say that the Bellas will win.

PREDICTION: The Bella Twins

3) Intercontinental Championship Ladder Match

Participants: Wade Barrett (C), Dean Ambrose, Stardust, Daniel Bryan, Dolph Ziggler, R-Truth, Luke Harper

There is so much talent involved in this match that it blows my mind R-Truth somehow got involved. Seriously, R-Truth? Why? True, the guy has been gainfully employed since 1999 by either WWE or TNA, but having him involved makes no logical sense. Of course I say that yet if you were to ask me to name someone else on the main roster that could've taken that spot (who isn't either injured or involved in an angle that would preclude their participation; i.e., Cesaro, Tyson Kidd, Sheamus, etc.) no one comes directly to mind with the exception of Goldust, and I think the only way his inclusion would've benefited the show is if he or Stardust were set to win the title. That would've been a great way to extend their feud, which is now dead in the water.

As it stands, I feel like whoever wins the IC title is going to do great things in elevating that championship, which has been woefully ignored for far too long. There are a lot of possibilities that can come from these men feuding with one another, but only time will tell where they go from here.

PREDICTION: Dean Ambrose

4) United States Championship Match - Rusev (C) vs. John Cena

In talking about professional wrestling, critics and smart marks like to talk about how someone either does or does not need to win because of how it can affect storylines relating to them. Even though some want to say that wins and losses don't matter these days, the truth of the matter is that they do (and they always will) because they affect our perception of how good or bad a wrestler's abilities are in the context of the angle they're involved. For example, last year at WM30 when Brock Lesnar defeated the Undertaker, Lesnar - who was already thought of as a monster - suddenly became this whole other thing in terms of him being thought of as a beast because of the fact he beat the Dead Man. In this instance you would likely find that a lot of observers feel John Cena doesn't need to win this match because of the fact he's John Cena - the man is one world title reign away from tying that of Rick Flair, for crying out loud. He should be used here to help further elevate Rusev, who's been a real tear here lately and who could be a very useful commodity in the coming year.

PREDICTION: Rusev

5) Randy Orton vs. Seth Rollins

When I originally wrote up my thoughts on where this match would go I talked about how a win for Orton would be a great way to finish off a feud that's been ongoing since November of 2014. The Viper being victorious wouldn't necessarily derail Seth Rollins seeing as how he's still able to direct his own destiny so long as he holds the Money in the Bank briefcase. Even so, I can easily see how the script might get flipped here and Rollins wins the match, and in convincing fashion without the assistance of anyone from the Authority being involved, thus making him into a legitimate contender in the future with or without the MitB contract. I'm sticking with my gut, though, and hanging by my original prediction of Orton getting the victory.

PREDICTION: Randy Orton

6) Sting vs. HHH

Of all the matches on the WM31 card, this one has my attention more so than any other. It's a match that is decades in the making. Sting - the legend, the icon, the stalwart representative of World Championship Wrestling who never left that company, even as it withered and died - now finally set to make his debut in a match for WWE. I honestly never thought I'd see the day, but if I have learned anything from watching professional wrestling for as long as I have it's that you should never say never.

There aren't many men left in the business who could serve as a quality opponent for a man like Sting, and one of them has a match on this same show with Bray Wyatt. Triple H is an old wily veteran who knows everything there is to know about ring psychology and what it means to tell a story inside of a wrestling ring. I am hoping this lives up to my expectations because, truth be told, they're pretty doggone high at this point.

PREDICTION: Sting

7) Bray Wyatt vs. The Undertaker

When Bray Wyatt lost to John Cena at WM30, his character literally had to be relaunched because the defeat left Wyatt at a point where he had nothing to do, nowhere to go, and no one to feud with. In the time since then he's mostly bumped around between his old charges, Luke Harper & Erik Rowan, and Dean Ambrose. Despite how uninvolved that may make him sound, the truth of the matter is that he's been able to capture the minds of anyone who watches him through some of the most stellar development anyone has brought to WWE programming in ages. Wyatt's promos in building this feud with the Undertaker have been nothing short of amazing, and they've mostly had to be thanks to the fact that Taker has been kept off TV - some say because of business, some say because he's not in the shape he once was. Regardless, this match strikes me as a turning point for both men. I don't know that either of them can take losing at WrestleMania two years in a row.

I predicted this man would win back in January. While I have some concerns over that selection I'm not going to deviate from it.

PREDICTION: The Undertaker

8) Brock Lesnar (C) (w/Paul Heyman) vs. Roman Reigns

This match has shown me a number of reasons why I hate the internet and what it's done to professional wrestling. Why? Because for weeks now all the talk surrounding it has been about one of two things: 1) Whether or not Brock is going to renew his contract with WWE or go back to UFC, or 2) how Reigns is terrible at anything other than looking like a greasy, long-haired tough guy while walking down stairs. Sometimes conversations around the match bring up a bit of both, but the fact remains that's all anyone's seemingly been wanting to talk about. The internet has made it infinitely worse because no one would know of Lesnar potentially wanting to skip town if not for it, and Reigns wouldn't be seen in nearly the negative light that he is if not for the fact that every Tom, Dick, and Harry with a cell phone can chime in on social media with their uniquely idiotic perspective on the matter.

Don't get me wrong, to an extent insider knowledge is fun. Here, for this contest, it's taken so much away from the actual match that I more or less just want it to be over so that we can move on to whatever's coming next. It all depends on what Lesnar's intentions are, which is rather startling seeing as how he could leave with the WWE world heavyweight championship and create such chaos that the ramifications of it would be felt for years if not decades to come. That could certainly happen, and Lesnar would be the only one to say whether or not that's what's going down, but I think he's smart enough to know doing a job isn't the end of the world.

PREDICTION: Roman Reigns

One of the things about this time of year that comes around just as regularly as WrestleMania itself is the thinning of the WWE roster. Many years ago I read in a book how wrestling promoters tended to run their product much like how a television series does in that they treated them as seasons with a beginning, middle, and end. For WWE, WrestleMania signals the end of the current season and the start of the next one. With that in mind, you can see how this becomes the appropriate time of year to let go talent that aren't viewed as being worth keeping around. I think we could be in for a deeper cull than usual this year as there is a wealth of talent under WWE's employ that aren't exactly going anywhere anytime soon.

Overall I'd say this stands to be an entertaining installment to the WM mythology. You've got legends, you've got brutality, and you've got a ton of unanswered questions many of which will likely still be unanswered after the show is over. Even so, it'll be as big an event as anyone in the world of wrestling has produced (well, since New Japan Pro-Wrestling's WrestleKingdom 9 event, anyway), and worthy of your attention. Until then, watch this trailer and imagine all the possibilities!

Event Report: WrestleForce presents AGGRESSION

I feel like I give WrestleForce a lot of coverage, to the point where I - as someone who wants to be able to put the spotlight on independent wrestling in the Carolinas as a whole - almost feel like I need to apologize for not spreading the love (for lack of a better phrase) more than I do. The fact of the matter is that promotions in this part of the world are so spread to the wind that traveling around to shows takes such an investment, financial and otherwise, that it's just not something I can do each and every month. WrestleForce is a local promotion that runs in a venue less than 45 minutes from my home, which makes it convenient. The fact that they're the best promotion in the state of South Carolina makes it ideal.

WF made their debut at a new venue for AGGRESSION, their first event of 2015. Gone are the days of them running out of a bar named for airplane storage - they've moved up to a genuine sports-oriented complex as they're now calling the Spires Recreation Center in Cayce, SC their home. It's a great move for them as I always felt having shows at a bar, while not a horrible option, does create some limitations in terms of being able to attract kids and families to events (not to mention potential sponsors or advertisers). You're not going to get little Bobby's Mom & Dad to take him to a show held in a bar when they were in church a few hours prior. You will, however, get them into a gymnasium in a decent neighborhood just outside of downtown Columbia and that was proven with this show as attendance was fantastic.

The opening match on the card was a real barn burner between the likes of Corey Hollis and former WF heavyweight champion Cedric Alexander. If you're thinking what I'm thinking it's that this match could have been much later on the card as these two are the kind of talents that could justifiably compete for a title anywhere they go. These two didn't seem to mind, though, because they put on a show that set the bar incredibly high for the rest of the night. Truth be told, this is the kind of match I could watch all day long and not get tired of it.



The unenviable task of following that went to a group of wrestlers aligned in teams for a 6-man tag team match where "The Party Man-imal" Zane Riley would join together with the Fortunate Sons (Jesse Windham & Billy Brash) to face the Equal Nation Demonstration (Avgerinos the Great, Jett Black & Kevin Phoenix) who were lead to the ring by their manager "The" Tommy Thomas. Any match involving Zane Riley has at least a chance to be entertaining, and that's exactly what this match was - entertaining!



WF shows don't always feature female competitors, which is a criticism I've seen some fans levy at them. Whether it be for the sake of diversifying a card or simply for providing some eye candy, I can't justifiably argue against the idea that having a consistent women's "division" is a good thing. Regardless, anyone wanting to see the women of WF in action were in luck as AGGRESSION featured the debut of two talented ladies - Lilly Mae and none other than Tessa Blanchard, the daughter of Tully Blanchard.



[SIDE NOTE: Before Lilly Mae and Tessa Blanchard's match, WF social media specialist and ring announcer Brett Wolverton had some issues with his microphone. The problems cropped up during Blanchard's introduction, and she was upset to the point of forcing Wolverton to shout her intro at the top of his lungs. WF's owner "The Fabulous Playboy" Bob Keller emerged from behind the scenes to seemingly save the day with a functional mic, but of course he couldn't let an opportunity to rib Wolverton go to waste...



Poor Brett...]

Next was a match for the WF tag team championship between defending champs The Flock (LODI & Sick Boy) vs. The Bravado Brothers (Harlem & Lancelot). Originally this match was to have been between The Flock and Worst Case Scenario (Ethan Case & Elijah Evans IV) but apparently there was some issue with WCS not having the proper licenses that are required for wrestlers per the South Carolina Athletic Commission. [SIDE NOTE: Ugh...] The Bravado Brothers held the WF tag team straps previously but were never granted a rematch after they lost the titles, which is why they were given the opportunity to replace WCS here. They would have to contend with the bout being contested under FLOCK RULZ, meaning there would be no rules!



After the tag team championship match and intermission there was supposed to have been a match between "The Twisted Metal Rebel" Hexx and "The Inspiration" Brady Pierce, a continuation of a feud stemming from their relationship with "The Midnight Son" Caleb Konley (Hexx was Konley's bodyguard, a role Pierce now commands). Unfortunately it seems as though Pierce had the same licensing issue as WCS as he was not allowed to compete at AGGRESSION per an official ruling by the SCAC. [SIDE NOTE: Double-ugh...] As such, the match ended in a forfeit and the win was awarded to Hexx. The state of their rivalry now sits in limbo as it's anyone's guess where things between the two will go from here.

I'm not sure how many casual fans of World Wrestling Entertainment realize the fact that Ricardo Rodriguez, who was the personal ring announcer for Alberto Del Rio for a number of years, also competed as a wrestler while he was in WWE's employ. He was seen mostly in appearances on NXT programming as the masked luchadore El Local. Rodriguez would make his debut for WF at AGGRESSION, and in an appropriate turn of events he would have his own personal ring announcer for his match against "The Modern Classic" BJ Hancock - none other than "The Party Man-imal" Zane Riley.



I know that labeling a match as a "match of the year" candidate isn't something to be taken lightly which is why I am genuine in doing so for the main event of AGGRESSION. Defending WF heavyweight champion "The Southern Savior" John Skyler would find himself locked inside a 15 foot high steel cage with "The Salem Sinner" Sixx and "The Thoroughbred" Jaxson James, two men who had each won the right to challenge the WF champion. (In order to give credit where credit is due, I applaud the crew WF had in place to install the cage; I've seen that process take an insane amount of time on independent events but they managed to get the thing assembled very quickly and securely.) I don't feel the match needs any more set up than that which is why I'm going to stop talking and let the action speak for itself.



The 2015 edition of AGGRESSION was a great event from top to bottom. I thoroughly enjoyed myself with this show and am very much looking forward to seeing what else WF has in store this year.

WrestleForce's next event will be UNLEASHED, which will feature the debut of former WWE Superstar Eugene, and it is apparently going to involve some level of fan interaction regarding how some (or possibly all) of the matches will be configured. Details and specifics on that are said to be forthcoming. I would imagine there will be a Control Center video released via YouTube in the near future that will spell out exactly what that aspect of the event will entail. UNLEASHED set to take place April 26 from the Spires Recreation Center. Check out the poster for that event and links to their social media sites below!

Facebook.com/WrestleForce
Twitter.com/WrestleForce

My Still-Way-Too-Early-to-Tell WrestleMania 31 Predictions

As of this writing we are but a few days removed from the 2015 edition of the Royal Rumble, World Wrestling Entertainment's January pay-per-view. If you know anything about the 2015 Royal Rumble you undoubtedly know that it was an event ripe with controversy. For the second year in a row WWE opted to take a creative direction that did not sit well with what I'll call a rather vocal, albeit possibly misguided segment of their fan base. Last year the uproar came when Batista returned and earned a WWE title shot by winning the Rumble match despite working a part-time schedule (he was back to promote the Guardians of the Galaxy film). Now the hullabaloo seems to be stemming from their having Roman Reigns win the Rumble match as opposed to someone else, namely Daniel Bryan.

I'm not going to delve further into the post-Royal Rumble shenanigans than that because every media outlet from Time to FOX Sports has chimed in on it. What I'd sooner talk about is the fact that WrestleMania 31 is quickly approaching and there's a whole lot up in the air at this point in time regarding the card. When I say "a whole lot", I'm talking 90% seeing as how the only match we know for sure is happening is the WWE World Heavyweight Championship bout featuring Reigns as he attempts to dethrone current champ Brock Lesnar. Everything other than that is purely hypothetical because no one knows (other than Vince McMahon himself, and there are those who would argue even he doesn't have a clue) what's going to ultimately take place at Levi's Stadium in Santa Clara, California approximately two months from now. That being the case, I'm here to bring you my still-way-too-early WrestleMania 31 predictions!

What follows should not be considered gospel as I am attempting to assemble the contents of the event based on current angles, storylines, and trends. Even so, as my previous efforts at predicting the WrestleMania matches have proven (which you can see for yourself here and here), I have a decent knack for predicting the winners - now we'll now see how good I am at predicting the body of the show as well as the outcomes.

PRE-SHOW:

1) WWE Divas Championship Match - Nikki Bella vs. Natalya/Paige/Brie Bella

The Divas division is as big of a mess as it has ever been seeing as how the ladies who make up this portion of the roster seem to be there to provide fodder for the Total Divas program on the E! Network more so than anything else. Nikki Bella has held the Divas title for a number of months and she's faced random challengers without anything resembling a consistent adversary. The Bellas have been in a number of matches, either tags or one-on-one contests, with Natalya and Paige so they are likely challengers. It was announced in the past few days that Paige will challenge Nikki for the title at the Fast Lane pay-per-view, so it's possible that the feud will carry over into WrestleMania. Now that Daniel Bryan has returned to active competition it only makes sense that his wife, Brie Bella, would begin to see the error of her ways in sticking by her ne'erdowell sister. I'm leaning towards this being a Bella vs. Bella match as it would make for an attention-getting scenario.

PREDICTION: Nikki vs. Brie
WINNER: Brie Bella

2) WWE Tag Team Championship Match - The Usos (C) vs. The Ascension vs. New Day vs. The Miz & Damien Mizdow vs. Tyson Kidd & Cesaro

The tag team division has been something of a revolving platform throughout 2014 although the Usos rule the roost currently. It's tough to say where WWE might decide to take things as there have been a few other teams to have glimpses of success as the Usos have traded the belts with both the Miz & Mizdow as well as the Dust Brothers (Goldust and Star Dust). Despite being a new pairing Tyson Kidd & Cesaro are growing in terms of popularity through their in-ring performance. A New Day (technically a trio made up of Big E Langston, Xavier Woods, and Kofi Kingston) and the Ascension (Konnor & Victor) are also relative newcomers to the division and there's been a lot of effort made lately to get attention on both groups but especially so for the Ascension. It feels like the Ascension are being made out to be the next challengers for the tag straps, despite the fact that of the options available they're probably the least popular choice.

PREDICTION: The Usos vs. The Ascension
WINNER: The Usos

3) NXT SPECIAL ATTRACTION/CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH - Sami Zayn (C) vs. Kevin Owens

If you are a wrestling fan and you have never watched a match from the rivalry of El Generico (now known as Sami Zayn) and Kevin Steen (now known as Kevin Owens), you should immediately stop what you're doing and go check out as much material involving the two of them that you can possibly get your hands on. Much like Batman and the Joker, it appears as though these two are destined to be at each others throats forever, and that's a beautiful thing. If they're given time to shine, they might make some of the main events look bad by comparison.

WINNER: Kevin Owens

MAIN CARD:

1) Dean Ambrose vs. Dolph Ziggler/Sheamus/Wade Barrett

Some combination of these guys will be on the card, I'm convinced of that. Dean Ambrose is one of the more popular talents on the roster and he's still fairly fresh off of a really spectacular feud with Bray Wyatt that served to elevate the former leader of the Wyatt Family as well as Ambrose (or so it did in my opinion). As for who Ambrose will face, I am leaning towards a confrontation with Wade Barrett since Barrett is the current WWE Intercontinental champion and it only makes sense that every title/title holder get an appearance on what is certainly the biggest event of the year.

PREDICTION: Ambrose vs. Barrett
WINNER: Dean Ambrose

2) Seth Rollins vs. Randy Orton

This is a feud that has been simmering away for a number of months as Seth Rollins took Randy Orton out of action by way of a series of curb stomps into various objects back around November of 2014. (This was a method for getting Orton off television for a while so that he could film a movie.) Rollins has been on a roll ever since then and he still has the Money in the Bank briefcase which he can choose to use at any point in time to challenge the WWE champion, whoever that may be. With all that in mind, I think he gives Orton a happy homecoming by doing the job here.

WINNER: Randy Orton

3) Daniel Bryan vs. Dolph Ziggler/Sheamus/Wade Barrett/Kane/Big Show

Much like the Ambrose match I discussed above, this is a match that has potential to go a lot of different ways with the only definitive aspect being Daniel Bryan's involvement. Bryan has a had long-running feud with Kane that appeared to have been put to bed permanently on a recent edition of SmackDown when Bryan defeated Kane in a casket match. Thus, I am eliminating Kane as well as Wade Barrett as possible opponents. Sheamus is still on his way back from injury and I feel like throwing him into WrestleMania would be a mistake; let him continue to rest and come back after Mania. A match with Big Show would be a classic David vs. Goliath contest and it could be a fun contest, but I think the match that would give fans the biggest pop and likely steal the show would be Bryan vs. Dolph Ziggler. It feels like a match made in the hearts of purist wrestling fans everywhere and I cannot find any fault in the pairing.

PREDICTION: Daniel Bryan vs. Dolph Ziggler
WINNER: Daniel Bryan

4) John Cena vs. Rusev

Rusev is the current WWE United States champion, and he's also got the "Ravishing Russian" Lana at his side. In a different era, Rusev would have likely been in line for a main event match against the likes of Hulk Hogan or Sergeant Slaughter thanks to his role as a villainous "super athlete" from a part of the world that still smells faintly of communism. For at least the time being he's going to be involved with a program pitting him against John Cena, which could potentially be disastrous to his momentum. As you may recall, Bray Wyatt was in Rusev's position at last year at WrestleMania 30 and afterwards Wyatt was so far buried in terms of his credibility that he had to be rebooted as a character. Wyatt spent months re-establishing himself and Cena went on to continue being Cena. I hope Rusev can grow from this and if he wins I think it will mean he's in line for bigger opportunities in the near future.

WINNER: Rusev

5) Triple H vs. Sting

You don't often see a match anymore that will literally go down in history as being an important, relevant contest in the overall spectrum of the professional wrestling industry, but this is exactly that. Sting is an icon in the world of wrestling, a man whose carry spans three decades and that features feuds with almost every big name in the sport throughout that same length of time. He accomplished that in spite of the fact that, until last year, he had never been signed to a WWE contract. It's difficult to believe but he's never had a match for WWE - that will change come WrestleMania 31 when he's challenged by Triple H, a man who himself has had a historic career. This may be the one and only time Sting ever competes in a WWE ring, and I for one expect it to be a tremendous contest.

WINNER: Sting

6) The Undertaker vs. Bray Wyatt

The professional wrestling world reacted like they'd been told their significant other had an incurable disease when Brock Lesnar pinned the Undertaker at WrestleMania 30. Taker's undefeated streak ended and many thought so too had his career as a professional wrestler. As it has turned out, there is another dark soul lingering within the WWE roster, that being none other than Bray Wyatt, a man many consider to be the most interesting character WWE has produced since the Undertaker. It's only fitting that they go to war with one another.

WINNER: The Undertaker

7) WWE World Heavyweight Championship Match - Brock Lesnar (C) vs. Roman Reigns

At the time of this writing there is some doubt as to whether or not the WHC match will go on as scheduled due in no small part to the backlash that occurred after the Royal Rumble pay-per-view. It's unclear if Roman Reigns will be the only challenger Lesnar will face or if he'll even be Lesnar's opponent. Regardless, I'm going forward in presenting this as the main event of the card because that's what current plans reflect.

Rumor is that Lesnar wants to return to the world of mixed martial arts and if that's true then he won't be hanging onto the WHC for very long (unless Vince McMahon and Dana White have orchestrated some incredibly intricate deal wherein a WWE title could be featured on UFC programming and vice versa, that is - I think that's about as likely to happen as me getting into Metallica). Reigns has been recognized for quite some time as the next big thing in terms of talents to be pushed to the next level, however he is still very much in need of help in getting over with fans when it comes to his promo work. He's like many other performers over the years in that regard who had amazing physiques and a great look yet were lacking in the area of charisma and the gift of gab. This is a tough call, and it's made more so by the fact that the Money in the Bank contract could come into play at any moment in time.

WINNER: Roman Reigns

NOTABLE POTENTIAL EXCEPTIONS:

- Goldust vs. Star Dust

This is being teased on TV right now and could be on the main card but I don't know that it is as valuable as the matches I've laid out herein. It's an attraction, for sure, just not one I am convinced will be worthwhile.

- Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

The AGMBR was featured on the WrestleMania 30 card and Cesaro was the winner of the match, but there's been no inclination as of yet that it will be a part of WrestleMania 31. This would be a way to get a lot of talent involved in the card but I don't think it's necessary when there are better contests that could be presented.

- Kane & Big Show


These two members of the Authority could be plugged into a number of different matches, the trick is whether or not they'll get those spots or even have a spot.

- Eric Rowan, Ryback, Wade Barrett, Luke Harper

These four men are stuck in limbo as far as their involvement with WrestleMania 31 is concerned. It would be entertaining to see Rowan and Harper go at it in some kind of gimmick match where they could get into some sort of insane arrangement. Barrett is one of my favorite members of the WWE roster and I hate that he as well as the Intercontinental title don't get the respect they deserve. Ryback is a meathead that I don't particularly care for one way or another, so no big loss there.

- Sheamus

There is a better than decent chance that WWE will pull the trigger on Sheamus' return prior to WrestleMania 31 and have him face Daniel Bryan, which would serve as a continuation to a quasi-feud they've had going ever since WrestleMania 27. I persist in the notion that Sheamus, who is apparently 100% after having been sidelined for the past few months with injuries, should be held off until after WM31 so that he can have a fresh start in a new program.


- AJ Lee

AJ Lee is one of the best female wrestlers in the world and yet she likely will have no place in the WrestleMania 31 card. She's been dealing with a neck injury as of late but depending on what you read and what you believe she's not as bad off as it would seem. That plays into the possibility that she might be getting the shaft thanks to the fact that her husband, CM Punk, is - well - CM Punk.

Event Report: World Wrestling Entertainment presents WWE Live (12-5-2014)

My wife and I were able to have a night out on the town this past Friday night, which is something that's a very valuable commodity now that the focus of most of our free time is taking care of the Duke. He's a bit needy since he is a newborn and all, but we're not holding that against him - it's not his fault he can't prepare his own supper or wipe his rear end yet, obviously.

This particular night was a special occasion seeing as how World Wrestling Entertainment was in Columbia, South Carolina for a live event at the Colonial Life Arena. If you didn't know, live events are also referred to as house shows because they are non-televised. Companies like WWE use them for a number of purposes. For one, they're quick cash generators as they typically take advantage of whatever the going storylines are on TV to pique the interest of fans in a local market. In addition, they're an opportunity for a promotion to test the waters in terms of how an audience reacts to a match, a new gimmick for a performer, or any number of things which may or may not wind up appearing in programming later on.

In this instance it looked as though a majority of what was going on had to do with the upcoming Tables, Ladders and Chairs pay-per-view that is set to take place later this month. That event will be headlined by a tables match featuring John Cena and Seth Rollins - who would also be headlining the event we saw in Columbia.

Getting in and around the parking lots at CLA has always been somewhat tricky seeing as how the building is in the middle of downtown Columbia, is adjacent to several major streets, sits on the doorstep of the University of South Carolina's Greek village, and there's usually no assistance from local law enforcement in terms of directing traffic. That last bit is an issue thanks to the fact that there are no traffic lights to control the flow of cars, rather a couple 4-way stops that leave it to motorists to negotiate matters amongst themselves.

We got to the arena around 6:30 PM by which time a majority of the front-most parking lot was filled. Cost for parking that night was $5 - that's not too bad seeing as how game day parking for events at Williams Brice Stadium will set you back $20 or more, depending on how close you want to be to the venue.

Our tickets were being held at will call even though I had purchased them as part of a pre-sale promotion. Why? Allow me to elaborate.

Face value of the tickets I chose was $25. Those seats were a good middle ground option since they were not as expensive as the $90 floor seats but with a better view than the $15 seats. (WWE offers what is called the WWE VIP Experience for certain of their events; this is a package that includes front row seating where you are given the chair you sat in that evening, a backstage meet and greet with some of the Superstars, and a few other perks. These packages start around $300 and go up from there. Yes, there were a handful of VIP seats sold at this event!) There was a section of limited view seats available for this event, which struck me as odd seeing as how there were no limitations on the view; "limited view" usually refers to seating situated in such a way that it can be blocked by staging used during TV tapings. As I mentioned earlier, this was a non-televised event.

After you add in CLA's fees ($9 per ticket for this show; I've referred to convenience/facility fees previously as the "take a dump" fee because I can only assume they want you to pay for the fact that you had to go to the bathroom while you were there), our total was $68. Wait, we're not done yet because that amount doesn't count the fee you incur depending on the ticketing delivery option you select: Mail delivery, print at home, or will call. I don't remember how much the other two were but at $3.50 will call was the cheapest of the three. (What that $3.50 covers I can only imagine. I gather these tickets are printed on parchment salvaged from an ancient Egyptian tomb and printed using the blood of pandas.) If you add in the cost of parking and ticketing delivery split between our two tickets, a $25 ticket in reality costs $38.25.

And folks in the pro wrestling business wonder why live event attendance is down!

I have to commend the people who work behind the scenes to operate and maintain CLA. It is a beautiful arena that is always pristine in appearance and the staff working there are generally quite cordial. I can't say as I've ever had a bad experience there.

Our seats were in one of the lower levels several rows off the floor. When it comes to events like this I've learned that the only good floor seats are in the front row. If you're sitting further back from that you're going to spend the majority of the time dodging the backs of other people's heads instead of watching the show. Given how much those seats cost, it's simply not worth it. For this reason unless I can get front row I'm perfectly fine taking a seat in the bleachers. Quite frankly I don't know that I would buy front row these days even if the opportunity presented itself seeing as how in my opinion the product doesn't warrant the cost.

A number of vignettes and advertisements were shown on the jumbo-trons around the arena before bell time, and these included a message from Dolph Ziggler who spoke about his Intercontinental championship match against Luke Harper that would be coming up later on in the evening. I can only guess as to what attendance might have been but I will note that there were plenty of good seats available. (The house looked about the same as what we've seen the last few times we've been to WWE live events in Columbia.) The show began promptly at 7:30 PM and our ring announcer for the evening was none other than Brandi Rhodes who is the wife of Cody Rhodes.

Here's a rundown of the card along with my thoughts on each match.

#1) Ryback defeated Curtis Axel

Ryback has had his name in the press a lot here lately thanks to having been the subject of some of CM Punk's comments made during an interview on Colt Cabana's Art of Wrestling podcast wherein Punk stated that Ryback was responsible for injuring him on a number of occasions. If Punk's statements are true, it would appear as though Ryback's previous gimmick of "The Corn-fed Meathead" Skip Sheffield wasn't that far off from reality.

Speaking of Ryback, he definitely benefited from being the first babyface (hero/good guy) to appear on the card as the crowd reaction he received was quite audible. It appeared to be coming from the same section of the audience that later on in the evening would be chanting "LET'S GO CENA!"

This seemed like an odd bit of booking to me because it was only a short while ago that Curtis Axel and Ryback were working as a tag team called RybAxel (appropriately enough). To my knowledge there was never a storyline presented as to why they'd be broken up, but then again the success of many modern WWE storylines is dependent upon the fact that their writers assume the fans suffer from some form of memory loss. (Hence the reason why Big Show has gone through something along the lines of 20 character turns - as in transitioning from hero to villain - during his run with WWE.) Nevertheless, you can tell who was Marty and who was Shawn out of their pairing based on the fact that Ryback was in the main event of Survivor Series and Axel has been relegated to appearances on Main Event (if you don't get the Marty/Shawn reference, I'm sorry but you've been reading this entry for far too long to be that far out of touch with this kind of material).

#2) Fandango (with Rosa Mendes) defeated Sin Cara

Fandango was announced as being "the new and improved Fandango". I bother with pointing that out because the wrestler now known as Fandango has been involved with WWE since 2006 (not the whole time as Fandango; he's had 3 or 4 other gimmicks) at which point he began working with Deep South Wrestling, an independent promotion that served as a developmental territory for WWE which no longer exists. He has worked there, Florida Championship Wrestling, NXT, and finally as part of the main WWE roster. For someone as talented as he apparently is to have had such a drawn out career with no real highlights to speak of is baffling to me.

Sin Cara came to the ring sporting a Lucha Dragons t-shirt, which is the name of the tag team he's involved with in NXT. As of this writing he and his partner, Kalisto, are the WWE NXT Tag Team Champions.

#3) Emma, Alicia Fox & Charlotte defeated Paige & The Bella Twins

There was a social media push before the show began towards getting the fans in attendance to use a Twitter hashtag to vote on whether they wanted to see a 6-Divas tag team match or if they wanted to see a 1-on-1 Divas match. In terms of offering up options to fans of pro wrestling, that's like asking a 6 year old if they want a chocolate-dipped ice cream cone or some nice blanched asparagus.

The big deal here was that Charlotte was involved. She's the current WWE NXT Women's Champion and, perhaps of more interest to most fans, the daughter of "The Nature Boy" Ric Flair. She was involved for the majority of the match and made a good showing for herself. The Flair references are a little thick with her presentation at the moment seeing as how she had "WOOO!"-ed about a dozen times before the match even started.

After the match was over, Nikki and Brie (the Bella Twins) began to argue with one another. The two of them are supposed to be on the same page according to what's going on within TV storylines, however they appeared to have split on less than amicable terms this night as Brie shoved Nikki and walked off on her own. That could be foreshadowing something to come down the line but it could also be an example of how house shows exist in a vacuum, meaning none of these events matter in the grand scheme of things because they aren't on TV and therefore aren't part of the running narrative.

#4) Intercontinental Championship Match - Dolph Ziggler defeated Luke Harper by disqualification

Going into the show I had this contest in mind as being a contender for match of the night. In reality it felt kind of flat, and that bugs me for a number of reasons. Knowing what these two are capable of and seeing the match they had, it surprised me that it was somewhat dull in its pacing. I knew Ziggler had zero chance of winning the title because titles never change hands at live events (that's not entirely true; they do change hands at live events but only about as frequently as we elect Presidents). The fact that the guts of the match didn't feature the sort of athleticism these two show off during episodes of RAW or Smackdown was disappointing but the decision to have the match end as the result of Harper pushing Ziggler into the referee was somewhat confusing (at first I thought the ref had disqualified Ziggler for making contact with him) and mostly unsatisfying.

- Intermission -

#5) R-Truth defeated Cesaro

As I mentioned on my Twitter feed, this is why CM Punk quit.

Here's another crazy booking decision which doesn't make any sense to me. Why would a guy like R-Truth, who hasn't been on any of the main WWE programming for a while now, get a win over Cesaro? I can only assume Cesaro is in someone's doghouse. If this is all the Swiss Superman will ever get to be on the main roster, then by all means send him back to NXT where he can be appreciated for having phenomenal matches with talent like Sami Zayn, Kevin Owens, Finn Balor, and Hideo Itami.

#6) A New Day (Kofi Kingston & Big E Langston with Xavier Woods) defeated WWE Tag Team Champions The Miz & Damien Mizdow in a non-title bout

This was my favorite match of the night because out of the 7 contests on the card it was the one that had the most energy and life to it. The Miz can get heat just by picking up a microphone, Damien Mizdow is one of the best characters in WWE right now, and I sincerely hope that A New Day goes far because those guys are working their tails off in that gimmick.

#7) John Cena defeated Seth Rollins in a street fight

The last event my wife and I attended together before this one was a WWE Live show in November of 2013 which was also held at CLA. The main event that night was a street fight between the Wyatt Family (Bray Wyatt, Luke Harper & Eric Rowan) and the team of CM Punk & Daniel Bryan. Fast forward to the present where the Wyatt Family doesn't exist, Daniel Bryan may or may not ever wrestle again, and CM Punk is gone from WWE completely. My how things change over the course of a year!

I have to give a hand to Cena and Rollins because this match was definitely more in line with what one would expect when you hear of a match being held under street fight rules than others I've seen. (Of course you could just as well interchange street fight, extreme rules, no disqualifications, and a few other labels that get added to matches where anything goes. Why WWE uses one instead of another is anyone's guess. Perhaps WWE conducted a study and determined that "street fight" was more effective in terms of marketing.) They brawled up and down the aisle, made use of a number of weapons, and Rollins had so much heat on him that he even managed to make a young female fan at ringside burst into tears. That's the kind of reaction you rarely see anymore in pro wrestling and it goes to show that no matter how many times John Cena may face insurmountable odds (and triumphantly overcome them) his loyal fans are there with him 100% of the time.

Rollins went through two tables during the match, once on a reversal out of an Irish whip into one of the corners and a second time via an Attitude Adjuster from Cena off the top rope. I believe Cena and Rollins had this same match at least once more during the loop of live events this past weekend, so that means Rollins likely went through 4 or more tables in less than 3 days time. All I can say to that is hopefully he has a good chiropractor.

All things considered this was a fun night out but the matches overall left both of us feeling like there was something missing. I don't know if that something is star power, emotional involvement, or what but this was a fairly vanilla piece of work. Looking back, I think it's interesting that out of 7 matches the heel (villain) only won once, that being Fandango.

Of course we couldn't go to something like this without shooting an episode of Rasslin' with Redbeard! I have to give my wife major kudos seeing as how she served as camera operator for more than a few shots that became a part of this episode. She humors me and my silly endeavors, which is just one reason why I love her.

The Sudden Proliferation of Bad Wrestling Posters - Part 4

It's been a few weeks since I published another entry in my "Sudden Proliferation of Bad Wrestling Posters" series - I hope that you, my dear readers, didn't think I'd run out of material. Never fear! So long as there are trailer park inhabitants with dreams of being pro wrestlers and people with questionable Photoshop skills (I say Photoshop even though some of these things look like they were put together in Microsoft Paint), there will always be bad wrestling posters.

We start off this entry with a real beauty from OMEGA Championship Wrestling which was used to promote their recent LOCO IN JOCO 2 event. Something I don't feel as though I've touched on in talking about exemplary posters in the past is the concept of form or how the layout of a poster makes the eye flow from one aspect of it to another. In the case of this poster, the LOCO IN JOCO logo (Say that 10 times fast!) creates a natural center point and the talent form a ring around it. Because of this, your eye naturally floats around the perimeter and you get to appreciate the quality each stock photo of the talent appearing on the show.

I was not at this event put I've seen photos and video from it and it was a literal standing-room-only affair. I have no doubt that these posters being seen in the local area played at least a part in that success!

Premiere Wrestling Xperience is consistently at the top of each of these entries, and there's a reason for that. I don't know if they have a dedicated art department or what but their posters are indicative of their having someone behind the scenes who's remarkably talented. This poster represents their DAWN OF A NEW DAY event. The only possible criticism I could make for this poster, and it would be reaching for something just to rake them over the coals about, is that they possibly could have incorporated a background that played into the idea of the "dawn" aspect of the event title. Like I said, that's me nitpicking for the sake of nitpicking - it's a fantastic poster regardless.

Flatline Pro Wrestling is an up & coming promotion operating not far from Augusta, Georgia that has gotten a lot of attention here lately and for all the right reasons. Their shows feature young, athletic, entertaining talent and their promoter seems to be doing a fine job of using every mechanism possible to get the word out about their events, which is a recipe for success. (Truly, it's amazing what can happen when wrestlers wrestle and promoters promote - people say the business is down, I say it's only down for promoters who aren't working hard enough.) There's a lot going on in this poster, which was used to advertise their REDEMPTION event, and it's a bit text-heavy but I have to say that I love what they're doing.

The talent stock photos are fantastic - clearly someone there gets what I've been saying about having crisp, clear images of the roster available for use in promotional materials. In this regard, I want to point out the center of the poster where two matches are detailed because this area is my favorite aspect of the whole thing. If you look there, what does it remind you of? From my perspective, it looks just like the versus loading screens from older fighting video games like Mortal Kombat and Street Fighter! I dig that and while I know they aren't the first to borrow the idea I think they've done it well enough to warrant taking note of it.

I don't recall that I've ever previously featured a poster from Shockwave Wrestling Entertainment in this series. They are one of several promotions (including Ring Wars Carolina and Steve Corino's Premiere Wrestling Federation) that seem to have popped up here lately in eastern North Carolina. North Carolina has never been lacking when it comes to professional wrestling, needless to say, but quantity doesn't necessarily equate with quality. That said, I feel as though this poster doesn't exactly deliver any incentives in the "I'm a wrestling fan but I've never seen these guys before" department. What I mean by that is, with the exception of Steve Corino, if I see this combination of talent on a poster I can't say that I'm going to become interested in attending the event. I see a lot of guys wearing shirts and two women who wouldn't make me turn my head if I saw them walking around in public. Harsh as though that may sound, this is a business where looks and physique matter almost more than anything else. The washed out, "antiqued" look doesn't help matters as it makes me feel as though it's there to try and hide flaws as opposed to compliment anything. As an admitted hard-to-please fan of professional wrestling, if all I ever see of SWE is this poster, unfortunately I won't have been convinced that the show is worth checking out.

I can't help but feel as though Southern Wrestling Association out of Forest City, North Carolina gets poorly represented by their posters. I genuinely hate to say that because I see photos and video from their events all the time, and hardly ever do I come away from absorbing that content feeling as though their shows aren't worthwhile. Quite the opposite, honestly - if not for the fact that it would be a 3+ hour drive for me, I'd probably attend their events. Be that as it may, this poster is what it is, which is to say more of the same from their "art department". I have no idea why you would select a photo of paint flaking off some random surface as a background image. Why? It doesn't make your product edgy, if that's what you're going for. The stock photos seem like whoever made this is doing the best they can with what they've got to work with, which is admirable in terms of effort but fruitless here because of the overall composition.

Here we have a poster from another North Carolina-based promotion, AIWF Mid Atlantic, even though you wouldn't know it from looking at this poster. Yes, the Allied Independent Wrestling Federations logo is present, but AIWF is the sanctioning body, not the name of the promotion. This is a fine example of a poster where the text on said poster overwhelms the featured talent. That's a bad thing because, as I've said before, a professional wrestling event poster isn't supposed to sell text, it's supposed to sell the wrestlers involved. Speaking of the talent involved, there are a lot of them pictured here - so many, in fact, that I think between them and the massive amount of text this may qualify as one of the most unnecessarily busy posters I've ever seen. On the plus side, the stock photos are of good quality, and there's a piggy bank piñata. (Because, lucha libre?)

Before I get into the next poster, I want to talk about something related to the AIWF. It is my understanding that the term "independent professional wrestling" was originally a descriptor for any promotion not operating under the umbrella of the National Wrestling Alliance. In other words, if you were indie then you weren't with NWA, and if you were with NWA then you weren't indie. Obviously this is a very old term, one that pre-dates the existence of World Wrestling Entertainment. Consider that definition and apply it to AIWF, which is essentially a take on the NWA model. How can you be independent if you're part of an alliance? Likewise, if you're part of an alliance then how can you be independent? It's semantics and it very much reminds me of this scene from the Brendan Fraser classic, Airheads (skip to about the 1:50 mark).



From the "we use images of wrestlers from 20 years ago because current images would scare people away" department comes this gem from the North Carolina Wrestling Association. And no, I'm not talking about Sonjay Dutt - that's a mostly current photo of him as he's arguably in better shape now than he ever has been before. I'm talking about Justin Credible, Jim Neidhart, Ricky Morton, and Buff Bagwell. None of those guys look like that anymore, especially not Morton. (To his credit, Justin Credible had fallen on hard times but does appear to be getting back into form.) Also, who knew Sonny Onoo was still taking bookings? Here I thought he'd retired and moved back to Japan so he could run one of those fancy dance clubs where all the guys are street racers or Yakuza and all the girls are way too young to be in such an establishment.

Professional wrestling isn't an industry that has much in the way of a moral center, but I'm going to get on my moral high horse here for a moment because the poster below from the Alabama Wrestling Federation is a disgusting example of what some people will do in an attempt to draw a crowd.

For years, Matt Osborne performed in WWE rings as Doink the Clown. He would go on to continue performing as Doink on the independent circuit after he was released from the company, however the nature of the costume and gimmick allowed for many people to rip off the character. On any given night you could see "Doink" appearing in Charlotte and Dallas, or Phoenix and Columbia, or Orlando and Brooklyn because there were dozens of copycats.

Sadly, Matt Osborne died in 2013 of a drug overdose. Because there is seemingly no honor among certain people within professional wrestling, here you have a promotion advertising an appearance by Doink the Clown.

I would not go to an event promoted by a company that does this sort of thing on principle alone. They should be ashamed, and so should anyone who works for them.

Moving on from that wretched stupidity, here we have our first ever exhibit from Action Packed Wrestling in Chester, South Carolina. (Not to be confused with American Pro Wrestling just up the road from Chester in Boiling Springs, SC.) I have to tread somewhat lightly here because I used to attend APW events. Their building wasn't far from Lancaster, SC which is my hometown and where I lived for the majority of my life. APW has the distinction of having had quite a bit of very good talent coming through their doors - for example, before he was Gunner in Total Non-stop Action/Impact Wrestling he was known as Phil Shatter and he was a mainstay for APW.

That having been said, I've joked that some of these posters could've been made in Microsoft Paint but I think this one actually was. If not Paint certainly some other rudimentary graphics application where that kind of firey, glowing border/outline thingy they've done there is considered a "high-end" effect. I think if I handed a 6 year old a box of markers, a pack of construction paper, some stock photos of those wrestlers, a pair of scissors, and a glue stick they could've come up with something more respectable than this.

In the wake of Extreme Championship Wrestling's demise there were several other companies that would go on to make use of many members from ECW's roster in an attempt at recreating the same kind of frenzied, chaotic, and oddly entertaining content ECW had been able to generate. One of those was Xtreme Pro Wrestling from Los Angeles, California. XPW never really stabilized itself (for a variety of reasons, main among them being the fact that their owner, Rob Zicari - a pornographer who runs a company known as Extreme Associates - was indicted for distributing obscene pornographic material), but the fact of the matter is that they were an established company that, technically, still exists.

That said, the poster below is not for Xtreme Pro Wrestling - well, at least not that Xtreme Pro Wrestling. This is the Xtreme Pro Wrestling that is based somewhere in the coastal region of South Carolina and has shows at a brewery in North Charleston.

Seriously, guys - I know it's not easy to come up with a unique name for a promotion these days but at least try to be original! And for that matter, if you're not sure someone else might be using the name you have settled on, there's this handy website called Google that will help you find pretty much anything ever recorded in the history of mankind, so you might want to look and see if it's already been copyrighted by someone else before you do anything silly like having t-shirts made.

Speaking of promotions with poorly chosen names, here we have a poster produced by Dirty South Championship Wrestling emanating from Supply, NC. I gather that DSCW is in something of a feud with Myrtle Beach's C4W Explosive Wrestling, which (perhaps not surprisingly) is a federation I've featured here in this blog series in the past. This poster is like Frankenstein's monster in that it's a whole bunch of pieces that don't necessarily belong together assembled into the final product. The shoddy stock photos, layout, and graphics aside, I'd like to point out that they've made egregious use of a copyrighted logo, that being of the Versus TV network (which doesn't actually exist anymore as it was converted into the NBC Sports network some time ago).

Reusing clip art or graphics is one thing but ripping off something like a corporate symbol is something else entirely.

Pop quiz, folks - what's the color of key lime pie filling and loaded with 7 examples of bad talent stock photos? This poster from New Millennium Championship Wrestling!

This is another poster I hate to drag through the mud because it was apparently meant to promote a fundraiser event. Be that as it may, I can't help but throw a few jabs at the gimmicks featured herein. "Ravishing" Shane Austin - nothing says "ravishing" like prison tattoos and cheap sunglasses on a guy with a double chin. "Dreamz" - watching him wrestle will put you in a coma, it seems to say. Chris "Thunder" Anderson - because claiming to be an Anderson is never a bad idea if you're a wrestler who's a heavyset guy with a beard. "Delta Squad" - that's the one Chuck Norris was in, right? (Nope, sorry, that was Delta Force.) "Tank Sherman" - instead of a Sherman tank, get it? (See what we did there?) "Ringlord Speedy" - what the Hell is that about?

Earlier in this entry I brought you a poster from Action Packed Wrestling, which is one of two APWs operating in South Carolina. Up next is a poster from the other APW, American Pro Wrestling in Spartanburg, SC, where there's apparently "A NEW SHERIFF IN TOWN".

That, friends, is nothing short of gimmick infringement. I just wonder if he got the Brahma bull tattoo (which, of course, has been made famous by "The Rock" Dwayne Johnson) before or after he decided to become a professional wrestler.

Conveniently enough, the last poster I'll give you in this submission is from Last Rites Wrestling out of Franklin, NC where they apparently prefer their posters the color of sweet potatoes instead of key lime pie filling. Also, what did people use to dry their CLOTHES before the advent of CLOTHES dryers?

CLOSELINES, that's what...

The Sudden Proliferation of Bad Wrestling Posters - Part 3

I may have developed a personal problem via this series of blogs. (If you'd like to get caught up, you can find part 1 here and part 2 here.) I find myself browsing random wrestling-related Facebook groups and pages specifically looking for horrible posters promoting independent professional wrestling events. Trust me when I say that there are plenty of examples out there. So many in fact that in gathering material for this post I had to create a directory on my hard drive especially for bad wrestling posters, going so far as to then create sub-folders. (Make fun of me for my organizational skills all you want, at least I know where my stuff is.) I'm doing my best to not acknowledge those actions as being detrimental to myself or my well-being; instead I persist in the notion that I'm doing a good deed here by alerting the rest of the world to the fact that not all posters are created equal. The goal here, after all, is to make the world a better place filled with high-quality posters that do justice in representing the men, women, and companies with which they are associated.

Our first poster this go-round is from Premiere Wrestling Xperience. Unfortunately this event wound up being cancelled (from what I saw there were concerns about the venue and its location), but despite that the poster is certainly top notch. I love the color scheme, the graphics are beautiful, and the stock photos of the talent featured make them all look like superstars. Since I started this series, PWX posters have been the precedent for which all others have been compared and so long as they're publishing material as good as this they will continue to be.

Up next is an offering from Champions With Attitude Pro Wrestling, a company that will celebrate a decade of running shows at the event promoted on the poster below. Not many indie wrestling promotions make it past year 2 much less year 10, so the fact that CWA has been around for as long as it has is a real testament to the folks working behind the scenes there.

Champions With Attitude has long been known for production value as their events feature staging, lights, custom entrance videos, and other elements that you just don't see on the independents. Their posters fall into that category as well as they are always vivid pieces that deliver information while being eye-catching. The only problem I have with CWA's posters is that they could be described as repetitive. The layout you see here is what they seem to use month to month, the only variation being the talent featured. Even so, theirs are still better than 98% of what's out there.

If you've been following this blog series and some of the other content I produce (Rasslin' with Redbeard, specifically), you'll know that I frequent WrestleForce shows because I enjoy them very much. I would go so far as to say that if they're not the best promotion in South Carolina they're at least in the top 2. With that in mind, this poster for their "FULL THROTTLE" event coming up in September is by far the best they've produced in quite some time. It would be gosh-darn near perfect if not for two things.

1) Lack of any discernible logo - no, "WrestleForce presents" is not a logo. This goes along with what I've preached before about branding, marketing, and how it's important to establish an identity.

2) The stock photos look great, but I take umbrage with the fact that Cedric Alexander (middle-right) isn't at the forefront of the featured wrestlers. Why? He's the current WrestleForce champion, that's why - John Skyler's talented, don't get me wrong, but if he's not the champ he shouldn't get top billing over the man who is.

Speaking of brand identity issues, I hate to say this but I have no idea what company the following poster is for - all I know is that there was apparently an event called Summer Smackdown 2. It bothers me that a group could put together a poster with graphics like those but then not try and establish themselves with a logo or even a name. That's just odd, quite frankly. There's a guy with a belt (albeit a replica belt): What belt is that? What division does he command? Or did he just wander in with it when photos were being taken and insist he be able to hold it?

Also, there are 16 members of the roster featured on this poster, 17 if you count the fellow with a question mark where his face should be. That's about 10 too many in my opinion as they could have certainly gotten by in making the event appear desirable by way of presenting a core group of attractive athletes.

Anarchy Wrestling in Cornelia, GA has seen more than a few stars come through the confines of their arena over the years. (If you didn't know, Anarchy Wrestling began as NWA Wildside and later transformed into NWA Anarchy before eventually settling as Anarchy Wrestling.) They are one of the most successful promotions in the southeast and yet their posters have consistently gotten on my nerves because of the fact that they are usually overcrowded with talent. Such is the case with this poster for their "HOSTILE ENVIRONMENT" event. For the life of me, I do not see the point in trying to get your entire roster on the poster. Draw people in with 6-8 of your best looking talent, men and women that will sell people on your event and make them want to pay money to be there.

Of course I say that then I have no choice but to refer back to my comment about the success of Anarchy Wrestling over the years. A great poster helps but it's icing on the cake if people already know they're going to have a great time at a show because of past experiences.

Ultimate Combat Wrestling in Union City, TN isn't a promotion that I've ever had the chance to see in person. Be that as it may, judging by this recent poster, I'm going to hazard a guess that they are a company with means and ideas but that may need a little bit of a boost to get them onto the next rung. This poster is of the sort that screams to me "I want to make something more interesting, I just don't have the tools to get what's in my brain onto paper". The stock photos look good. The information fans need is all there. The fonts and letter spacing could be better but I would much sooner look at a poster like this that's clean and minimal in what it's doing than something that's bloated with unnecessary material.

As the final example of a "tweener" for this entry, I present to you a recent poster published by Southern Wrestling Association operating out of Forest City, NC. For starters, I have no idea what's going on in the background. I'm guessing here but I think it's a trio of images from horror films (the top third looks like it could be from Let the Right One In/Let Me In, and the bottom third might be something from The Ring, and the middle could be anything). The title of the event is "HALLOWED GROUNDS", but even so the horror film imagery doesn't make sense - all it does is create a muddy palette. The talent stock photos are mostly suspect and they're much too small to be effective at selling the athletes as being the reason why a fan would want to come to the show. (Again, when making a poster you have to sell the talent; graphics and fonts are great but people aren't paying to see your juiced up copy of Photoshop, they're paying to see wrestling.) This isn't a good poster by any means but it's not awful either. With some edits it could actually be a solid piece of work but as it is it's mostly displeasing to look at and, to me, it doesn't do a good job of making me want to come to the event.

You may have noticed that this image is actually a photo someone took of the poster. For the record, I don't think I've never seen a pure digital copy of an SWA poster. Needless to say, that is rather odd.

Have you ever encountered something that you want to dislike but can't for whatever reason? Pickled ginger comes to mind; it tastes like Pine-Sol smells yet I enjoy it immensely! As another example of that, I give you the following item from Milestone Wrestling's July 2014 event. A poster that has so much patriotism and American pride going on that it's a Ronald Regan reference away from being perfect - perfectly insane, that is. The artist must be a fan of westerns because he stuck John Wayne in there. Was John Wayne a fan of professional wrestling? Could you imagine John Wayne in a wrestling match, especially in one against any of the guys on this poster? He'd probably whip the lot of them all at once then say something like "You boys rassle about as well as a one-legged horse trots...How 'bout you do yourselves a favor and learn from that critter by staying on the ground."

I know I harp a lot about stock photos and the importance of having good ones. I persist that if you're going to be in this line of work you've got to do your best to make the talent look desirable, and you can't do that with stock photos of your roster that look like images printed from a cell phone photo on an inkjet printer then scanned on low resolution settings. Even as a stylistic choice where filters could be used to create certain looks it's still a bad idea to me to do something to make your talent - who are hopefully guys & girls who look like athletes - come off poorly. In that regard, take a look at what South Carolina Wrestling has done for their "STILL STANDING" event. The graphics aren't bad but here again they're there for the purpose of accentuating the talent. Do any of those guys look like wrestlers you would pay money to see perform? If the answer is no, then I'm afraid I've got some bad news (get well soon, Wade)!

The poster below from Southeastern Pro Wrestling in Double Springs, AL is an awful wrestling poster because it, like seemingly so many others I've torn to shreds in this entry, has way more text on it than it does vivid imagery of professional wrestlers. I don't know how many more different ways I'll be able to say the same thing - it makes no sense to me that the folks who design these things don't consider the fact that WRESTLERS are the reason why fans come to pro WRESTLING events. As a fan, I don't really care about "special challenge" matches. And for that matter, I don't think I've ever in my life seen a promotion point out what the "opening match" will be. It's as if to say, "Yes, the show starts at 8 PM but Douche Haven and Chris McCantwrestle are on first so you've got til 8:20!"

Perhaps more offensive than the poster itself is the fact that SEPW is using a replica of the World Wrestling Entertainment intercontinental title as their intercontinental title as well as replicas of the World Championship Wrestling tag team titles as their tag team titles. Nevermind the fact that an indie company having an intercontinental title is silly to begin with. Does no one know the etymology of the word "intercontinental"? Does anyone know what etymology is, for that matter?

I must preface my comments about this next poster with the fact that I did, in fact, attend the event it promotes. It was a fun show with some great talent from the region featured on the card. (It was a bit bizarre in the fact that Gangrel - a vampire - and Dr. Creo - a voodoo practitioner - who work together as the tag team "The Sons of Midnight" were fan favorites. Seriously, children were cheering for a guy with fangs & blood dripping from his mouth and a guy who brings a smoking skull to the ring.) Plus, any reason to go to Charleston, SC is a good reason because Charleston is awesome regardless. Niceties out of the way, Old School Championship Wrestling needs a lot of help when it comes to their posters. I've followed them for years and I can tell you that this is more or less what you get with their promotional materials - weird, solid colors for the background and stock photos that often make the wrestlers look dumpy and somewhat misshapen. OSCW has been around for a long time and they've never gotten better than this. It makes me think the hamster is asleep in the wheel, as in someone cares enough to keep it alive but doesn't care so much that they want it to be more than it is.

Southern Fried Championship Wrestling. Do I really need to say anything else? The guy in the upper-right looks like he doesn't eat anything unless it's dipped in batter and deep fried. And is it me or does has he have bits of processed cheese slices wrapped around his fist? As for the guy in the top-left, I can't decide if that's an obscene hand-gesture he's making or not. I'm leaning towards it is because his presentation of being half Jeff Hardy mark/half Juggalo is an obscenity in and of itself.

Operating out of the upstate of South Carolina in Gaffney, 3CW - which is short for Carolina Christian Championship Wrestling (that name is something of a mouthful) - has drawn my ire previously and I'm sad to say that matters have not improved since the last time I saw one of their posters. This looks like it was put together by an infant, or possibly a grown-up with an infantile sense of what a wrestling poster should look like. If it had been put together by an infant, I'd probably compliment the child on the fact that they could make this because their skills will hopefully continue to develop. Since that more than likely wasn't the case I'm just going to sit here and shake my head for a moment because I don't know how else to react to a wrestling promotion that bothers to add its referees to their posters.

Before I get into commentary on this next poster, I feel as though I should shed light on two acronyms that are present here. First, AIWF, which stands for Allied Independent Wrestling Federations. It's something of a facsimile of the National Wrestling Alliance in that member promotions share talent and there are championships sanctioned by the AIWF that may be defended at events falling under the AIWF banner. Second, EDGE Wrestling, short for Extremely Dangerous Grappling Entertainment. Sounds kind of like someone might have borrowed from GOUGE (Gimmicks Only Underground Grappling Entertainment) or even OMEGA (Organization of Modern Extreme Grappling Arts) on the name, but I digress.

As for the poster itself, your guess is as good as mine as to what's going on here. The talent featured on the poster appear to be guys who take their craft seriously as from their builds they do look like athletes. Even so, the photos are too small and so poor quality that I can't make out much about them. There appears to be a planetoid in the upper third of the poster, which may or may not be the moon, and to its immediate right there's a tiny graphic of the continents of planet Earth. There could be some message of world domination in there but you'd have a hard time convincing me of it. But hey, at least they have a logo!

I have to point out that I'm fairly depressed right now. Having written this post in mostly one sitting and thereby having forced myself to dwell on the subject matter herein for a fairly lengthy amount of time, I will tell you that my mind is in a place where I feel as though I could benefit from certain types of pharmacology. And grain alcohol. Do they make whiskey flavored anti-depressants? No? Darn.

In wrapping up this entry to my Sudden Proliferation of Bad Wrestling Posters series, I bring you this poster from C4W Xplosive Wrestling from Myrtle Beach, SC. From my perspective, this is an example of how to do everything wrong in regards to a pro wrestling poster.

The text at the top of the poster states that C4W is "Myrtle Beach's #1 professional wrestling attraction". I'm somewhat offended that they chose to refer to their product as an "attraction" because the term plays into the tourist vibe of that area and in so doing cheapens the product. Also, to my knowledge, they are the ONLY pro wrestling company operating in Myrtle Beach. Is there a point to telling people you're number one when there isn't a number two, three, four, five, etc.? The text goes on to tout their having been voted the "Best New Promotion in the Carolinas" in 2011. That's cute, but that was three years ago. What have you done since then?

I've preached about the importance of logos in terms of an emblem being a great way to market a brand. In contrast, I never thought I would have to preach moderation in regard to logos but here I am about to do exactly that. There are 5 logos on this poster - three that have to do with C4W, one for AIWF, and I'm counting "The Civil War" graphic as one as well. The asinine nature of the name "C4W Xplosive Wrestling" aside (I can only imagine the creative process in picking that name had something to do with the fact that it would allow for the usage of words like "xplosion" and "xplosive", because of course any word that starts with an X is edgy), why use three of your own logos? Did whoever designed this think people were going to get lost while viewing it and forget they were looking at a C4W poster? "What, where am I? OH, C4W...I like potatoes!"

Let me take a moment to criticize "The Civil War" logo. I don't want to come off as a person who's easily offended by this sort of thing but I feel like using the phrase "the civil war" in relation to something like promoting a wrestling event is absolutely classless and in horribly poor taste. As if we don't have enough reminders of that bloody, tragic era of American history still being flamboyantly displayed here in South Carolina, I can't think of any good reasoning why a company would choose that as the title for one of their events. Use some other reference to warfare if you really have to, but not that - especially not here.

If you look closely at the ribbon running behind "The Civil War" logo you can see that the dates 1992 and 2010 are on either side of it. Refer back to the text at the top of the poster; "2011's Best New Promotion in the Carolinas". Either that logo is a piece of stock clip art someone at C4W found and decided to use without thorough inspection or an attempt at modification, or someone's timeline doesn't make sense. Could be a little of both in this scenario, but I digress.

Finally, I cannot leave out from my criticism the most inane aspect of this entire poster. The text beginning with "Battle Lines" and down from there is printed in a font called Comic Sans. Comic Sans is a font that was originally created for use in speech bubbles for help assistants in programs like Microsoft Office. (Remember Clippy the paperclip? Comic Sans is his native tongue.) Because of its cartoony, somewhat goofy nature, these days it is widely regarded as a font that should be reserved for use only by people who are 10 years old and under. People who don't know any better, in other words. The reason for that is because it looks silly and unprofessional, "silly" and "unprofessional" being two things one should try to avoid at all costs in the realm of professional wrestling.

I'm tapping out from this entry - I've had enough for now, but trust me when I say there will be more to come in the future.