Tuesday, July 15, 2014

Letter to My 16 Year Old Self

I've seen numerous blog entries of this nature from other writers. I'm not one to normally jump on trends as it relates to blog topics but it feels right at this moment in time. Seeing as how I'm coming up on my thirty-fourth birthday (I chose to spell it out because it looks more regal that way, obviously) and considering how I'm never too bashful about reminiscing, I figured I would try my hand at talking to a version of myself who, as I remember it, could've used an ally to provide advice about life, school, and a lot of other things.

Dear Robert,

If my (Our?) memory serves me correctly, at this point in your (Our? I'm going to have to settle this before the end of the letter, I realize.) life you're preparing for our (That didn't take long...) junior year of high school. Right about now you're dreading the idea of having Mrs. Courtney's English class because, as you will soon find out, everything you've heard about her actually is true.

Forgive me for doing so, but I'm not going to tell you much of anything specific in terms of what happens to us in the future. I apologize for that since I know we've never been too fond of folks who talk in vague generalities. Like Doc Brown said, a man should never know too much about his own future, lest he do something to change it.

I (We? Here we go again...) am on the cusp of turning 34 years old as I write this. What I mean to say with that comment is that so long as you don't screw up we're guaranteed to make it at least this far in life. That's right, I'm putting this on you because it's your responsibility. Life's pretty darn awesome right now and I'd hate for you to miss out on the ride.

You've come a long way and you've been through a lot. I want to start this off by reminding you that you should feel fortunate and appreciative to be where you are. You may not realize it but there are a lot of kids out there who would do anything to have as privileged a life as what you've had. That doesn't mean you should be annoyingly snooty about who you are or what you have, it means you should thank the people who support you. You haven't done it yet but someday you're going to learn the value of having worked to earn something. Above all else, show respect to your family and give thanks for what they provide you with. As you already know, the people you love won't always be there - treasure them while they are.

The years you're experiencing right now will, at times, feel like they are dragging by because you have things to which you're looking forward. Try to enjoy yourself, whatever scenario you find yourself in. You've always been a worrier and that's not a good thing. (I wish I could tell you we move past that mentality, but I'm afraid I've got some bad news; stomach cramps are in your future.) Hear me when I tell you that stressing out over things you can't change is only going to make you miss out on that which you enjoy.  Those things will come - maybe not necessarily as soon as when you'd like or in the manner you expected, but you'll get there.

School is what you're focused on these days, high school specifically. As I mentioned earlier, Mrs. Courtney is everything she's billed as being. That's a good thing, though, because she and Mrs. Thompson are going to prepare you more so for college than any other educator you're going to encounter. Keep working hard, because it's nice to be in your thirties and not be living with a mountain of debt related to loans for college tuition. Buford High School will be with you, always.

Speaking of college, it's going to be a real treat and for a multitude of reasons. You're going to meet a lot of interesting people and do stuff that you can only get away with when you're in your late teens or early twenties, and that's exactly how life should be. Still, you've got a lot of work to get done - some of it's going to be important, some of it you'll look back on and see was a waste of time. I hate to say it but based on where we are now, more of it falls into the latter category. It is what it is, though, a necessary part of your evolution.

After college is where life gets a bit weird. Not that it hasn't been weird to that point, mind you, just more weird. Weirder? I guess that's the best way of putting it. Remember, I'm doing my best not to be too specific here. Weird isn't necessarily synonymous with bad although there is going to be a stretch where you question everything you've done up until then because it's going to feel like all the effort you put out hasn't been met with an equal result. (In that regard, I'll remind you that internships aren't a bad thing and when a friend offers you a paid gig you'd be well advised to call him back, at the very least.) That's why it's called paying your dues.

Eventually the mundane monotony gives way to an opportunity. Keep in mind that there are a lot of factors playing into the why's and the how's of your life. The world gets whacky in the future and a whole bunch of very talented, highly experience people will be going through the same thing as you young kids who are also talented but not that experienced. Your time to shine (and to prove yourself) will come, you just have to be willing to accept that your path is definitely on the scenic route of life, if you catch my drift. You could say that it meanders - on that note, do try to take good care of your knees while you're at it.

Relationships of the romantic variety will come and go, meaning you're no different than anyone else in that aspect. You're going to meet a couple real doozies that will make you wonder why you even bothered, but you're also going to meet a few that will turn into really cool friends. Despite your take on marriage being an archaic concept, there's one you'll meet that, when you get to know her, you'll know is the one. You'll make her life an adventure, and she yours.

As I write this, she and I are on another great adventure, one that we hope will lead to our family growing - potentially substantially, depending on how things shake out. It's a process that we have endured because our desire to share what we've been blessed with means a lot to us. I can't tell you how much it means for me to have the chance to be what we never truly had.

In closing, I will tell you that I don't have that many goals left in life, be they personal, professional, or whatever sits between. Take that for what you will - and no, I'm not trying to brag. I'm merely stating the truth. You've got a lot to look forward to just as I have a whole lot of fond memories that I can look back on. If this has started to come off as something of a pep talk instead of an informative letter, that's because my intention all along with this was to let you know that you're valued, you're appreciated, and you will experience greatness in your life.

Regards,

- You

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